Gratitudinous Flub-Dubbery

Identity, Self, Authentic, Self-Actualization

I just recently learned a lesson that I should have learned many year ago …. “If you are going to do anything to help someone else never ever expect to receive anything in return.” If you are going to give something to help someone else out of a difficult circumstance, then do not give with the expectation of being thanked and definitely do not base your willingness to give on the expectation of being loved, admired, respected or even thanked in many cases.

If you are giving something to help someone with the desire or the underlying desire to be appreciated, then you are doing your giving with the wrong attitude and if that is the case, you might just as well not reach out your hand of generosity in the first place. If you are planning to give something to someone to help them, then give it for the sole reason that you are a caring human being and they are a needy human being. If you try to take the exchange to another level, you are going to be spinning your wheels much of the time and you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

I just spent more than a Thousand dollars trying to help lift another person out of a horrible, hurtful circumstance. All during the adventure, we had a lot of fulfilling conversations and I actually thought I had gained a new friend. But after the circumstances calmed down, my “New Friend” pretty much stopped talking to me altogether. I did not hear from him for hours and days at a time. In the end, I blocked him on the social media.

I was probably giving for selfish reasons. If that is the case, then I am sorry. But his story was so compelling and heart-wrenching.

It will be awhile before I do anything like that again.

I have to adjust my expectations and to realize that nobody owes me anything ever.

I am strong. I can live with that.

5 thoughts on “Gratitudinous Flub-Dubbery

  1. My Mum used to always say the old thing, “You do not give to receive”. I think it’s a corruption of a Bible quote, but not sure. I prefer to give anonymously, as in regular donations to charities that interest me. That way, I never expect any thanks or recognition from those donations, and I don’t get upset when that doesn’t happen.
    Best wishes, Pete.

    Liked by 1 person

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